Had to rush Turner to the doctor today. My younger sister was watching him at work and she called saying he had been throwing up, not spitting up, but throwing up and been really fussy. So I of course, rushed to get my work down and drove and immediately took him to the doctor. Between my OCD and my clinically diagnosed anxiety, things like this really throw me for a loop. I have a very strict Tuesday schedule for the newspaper. Little things like extra phone calls send me a straight panic, so the fact that my typically controlled, organized and strategically planned day was every but, made for a bad time. Maybe I didn’t need to, maybe I am being a little bit crazy, but I blame it on being a new mom.
Last night Turner decided he wanted to get up at 3 a.m. to start his day, so we did. So needless to say, I came into today already exhausted. My other writer at work in on vacay for his honeymoon, so I am extra slammed, as Tuesdays are already my busy day at the paper. Just a recipe for disaster. So on top of that, Turner is a little sick. He had a slight fever and some grumbles in his stomach so the doctor gave him prilosec and told us to come back in a week for a check up.
Days like today make me reconsider the no daycare/nanny option Andrew and I decided on. I mean, I wouldn’t trade giving up my two days a week with him for anything. It is by far the highlight of my week. If I could have it my way, I would stay at home and keep him full-time. But that is just not an option.
But with my little sister freaking out and rushing to get him, then having to go back to work, but still having Turner, it was a rush to find someone to keep him so Andrew and I could finish out our work days. Luckily, Andrew’s mom came to the rescue, but I know she will not always be able to do that.
So what do you all think of childcare? I would like private in-home option for now. A retired teacher type. I do not like the idea of a mass daycare with tons of kids running around, not ever if I can help it, but certainly not with Turner only being almost 4 months old. How do you find a balance? How do you find good options?
Where we live, statistically, there is only childcare options for 50 percent of the children here. There is already a shortage, and on top of that, I would ideally like to find something part time so I can still have my days with Turner. Any suggestions? Pros and cons?
I am at a loss here really. Its frustrating, and sad. I wish I could go back to the 50s when it was acceptable and even expected for women to stay at home and be the housewife. I would make an amazing housewife… but then I would have to give up the third love of my life… my job. Such grownup, stressful decisions.
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