To daycare or not to daycare?

Had to rush Turner to the doctor today. My younger sister was watching him at work and she called saying he had been throwing up, not spitting up, but throwing up and been really fussy. So I of course, rushed to get my work down and drove and immediately took him to the doctor. Between my OCD and my clinically diagnosed anxiety, things like this really throw me for a loop. I have a very strict Tuesday schedule for the newspaper. Little things like extra phone calls send me a straight panic, so the fact that my typically controlled, organized and strategically planned day was every but, made for a bad time.  Maybe I didn’t need to, maybe I am being a little bit crazy, but I blame it on being a new mom.

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Last night Turner decided he wanted to get up at 3 a.m. to start his day, so we did. So needless to say, I came into today already exhausted. My other writer at work in on vacay for his honeymoon, so I am extra slammed, as Tuesdays are already my busy day at the paper. Just a recipe for disaster. So on top of that, Turner is a little sick. He had a slight fever and some grumbles in his stomach so the doctor gave him prilosec and told us to come back in a week for a check up.

Days like today make me reconsider the no daycare/nanny option Andrew and I decided on. I mean, I wouldn’t trade giving up my two days a week with him for anything. It is by far the highlight of my week. If I could have it my way, I would stay at home and keep him full-time. But that is just not an option.

But with my little sister freaking out and rushing to get him, then having to go back to work, but still having Turner, it was a rush to find someone to keep him so Andrew and I could finish out our work days. Luckily, Andrew’s mom came to the rescue, but I know she will not always be able to do that.

So what do you all think of childcare? I would like private in-home option for now. A retired teacher type. I do not like the idea of a mass daycare with tons of kids running around, not ever if I can help it, but certainly not with Turner only being almost 4 months old. How do you find a balance? How do you find good options?

Where we live, statistically, there is only childcare options for 50 percent of the children here. There is already a shortage, and on top of that, I would ideally like to find something part time so I can still have my days with Turner. Any suggestions? Pros and cons?

I am at a loss here really. Its frustrating, and sad. I wish I could go back to the 50s when it was acceptable and even expected for women to stay at home and be the housewife. I would make an amazing housewife… but then I would have to give up the third love of my life… my job. Such grownup, stressful decisions.

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4 thoughts on “To daycare or not to daycare?

  1. Hey Brittney!! You are struggling with the age old question of childcare (loads of fun isn’t it!!) I just thought I would throw in my opinion since I have had both experience with daycare and staying at home. When Kaya was 5 weeks old I went back to work and it was awful!!! I hated to leave her and worried constantly about her. She stayed some with my mother in law, her aunt and uncle, close family friends etc but we never had a “routine” just kind of planned by the seat of our pants for the first few months. That was hard and unpredictable soooo I found a small in home daycare-she kept 3 kids total-and it was perfect! When she turned 2 she went to a larger in home daycare (deanie hurst who still does it!) and it was also wonderful!!! Now with the twins I was blessed to be able to stay home for the first 5 years. It was amazing to have those day to day memories and be home to see all the “firsts” BUT I don’t think it helped nor hindered them being home with me. I do feel children should b exposed to other children and (loving) adults because it helps to socialize them and offers them different experiences, routines, etc then when they are at home or with family. BUT (there are a lot of buts here! ) what I can tell you is there is no right or best option! You need, and will do, what is exactly right for your little family and Turner will thrive in whatever choice you make because that decision will come from a place with nothing but the purest love you and Andrew have for him. Good luck as you face yet another “mommy hurdle” you will do amazing:)

  2. I don’t have any family within a day’s drive of where we live. Daycare was our only option. My daughter goes to daycare full time. I’d love if she could only go half time, but this is reality. She goes to a center. I like this versus a home daycare because I know they are monitored and regulated very closely. She also has peers at a center. A home care many only have 1 or 2 infants whereas my daughter is in a room with 8 infants. They have two teachers and at least one or two assistants at all times. I don’t think I would be able to replicate the socialization and structure that daycare provides. My daughter is blowing through her milestones– crawling at 6.5 months, for example. Kids learn so much from each other. I would love to stay home with her, but daycare is the next best thing. I feel so comfortable with her care providers. They love her and I know she’s in good hands.

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