Finding time for myself among a world of changes

I have really fallen behind in my weekly blog postings. I am sorry, especially because I love them so much. But luckily, Andrew and I will be moving at the first of the month, so I will have internet service at home. With that option now, I will be able to post at home at night instead of trying to fit it in while I am working.

I am really looking for some big changes in my life right now. In addition to moving, which Andrew and I are so happy about because its a great location for our jobs and his family in Macon and my family in Jackson, we no longer will have a 45 minute drive to church either. Its in a gated community so I will feel much safer being at home alone with Turner while Andrew is traveling for work, and there is phone and internet service, so I will be a very productive member of society! The house is beautiful and will give us so much more room for Turner. In Turner’s short 5 ½ months here, he has accumulated more things than Andrew and I combined and we have completely outgrown our current home. Its amazing how fast it all happened. And with Christmas right around the corner, we don’t have room for a Christmas tree, must less a place for any toys he may get. So a new house is a big move, but a better move, and we are excited.

I am also looking at a job transition. I love my job. I have never wanted to do anything in my life other than write and help people. As a newspaper reporter I get to do those things ever single day. While I write about news, I also get to write about features, which range from highlighting the community or raising awareness for a cause. I love doing it every single day. I love the people and friends I have met, and the lives that I have impacted. I would want nothing more than to work for a community newspaper for the rest of my life. But unfortunately, I live in a very small town. We have two papers, the one I work for and one other. So there are not an abundance of jobs floating around. But I have reached a breaking point with my current employer. I hate it really, because personally, work is perfect, but I think professionally, it is time for a job transition. I feel like I am abandoning the community, but I think (I hope and pray) it is what is best for my family. I am still not certain thought. Especially with the holidays, its so hard to take a leap of faith with Christmas and things right around the corner. I have looked into a few other career opportunities, and hopefully, if it is what God sees to be best for me, it will all work out. Its in his hands now. Just keep your fingers crossed for me in the meantime.

We went and had our Christmas photos taken at Turner Field this weekend. As I am sure you are all aware by now, Andrew and I are huge Braves fans, I mean, our son’s name is Turner. So when the opportunity came to take Christmas pictures on the field, we jumped on it. We were one of 16 families who got to do it. We got to hang out in the Braves Clubhouse. It was a lot of fun. We are waiting for the professional photos from the Braves to come to order Christmas cards, but we were able to snap some photos ourselves, so enjoy those.

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I really want to post more. I need input from other moms. I find myself having days that I really struggle with depression. I don’t know if you would consider it postpartum depression, or if its just the same depression I have struggled with my entire life. But regardless, some days are hard and being able to talk to other mothers not just about that, but just about being a mom in general, is a beautiful therapeutic thing. I appreciate you all taking time to read what I write and I really appreciate all of your input and advice. This motherhood thing is hard, and I learn something everyday.

 

 

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5 thoughts on “Finding time for myself among a world of changes

  1. Hi! Thanks for swinging by over at http://livingforthelaugh.com! Motherhood! While I believe it to be the most holy of places to be in life it can also feel like the loneliest at times. Too often moms spend more energy being competitive that supportive. I have found mounds of support over the last few years via the web, to the point I sometimes wonder how our mothers did it!:-) Your not alone. Don’t be ashamed or embarrassed about feeling alone or depressed. Every mom has been there and if they tell you otherwise, run baby run cause they are lying!!:-) Hang tough.

  2. I think depression in moms is WAY more common than people would like you to think… and I don’t mean “I don’t know why, but I hate my baby” or “he wouldn’t stop crying so I drowned him in the tub” postpartum depression.

    Becoming a mother is a MASSIVE life change, one that you juggle FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. Some of the major symptoms are pretty par for the course for being a mom (fatigue, feelings of guilt, etc)

    You’re allowed to feel blue… Even the most “adjusted” perfect on paper moms miss the days where SLEEP and LONG SHOWERS and the word CARE FREE existed. I definitely have days where I don’t want to get out of bed, because holy crap, how am I supposed to handle all of this, why does it NEVER END?!?!

    But you give yourself a few hours (and a glass of wine?) to get over it, and you remember that without a doubt, you would go days without sleeping, or consistent showering, because what are you if you aren’t that sweet nuggets mom?

  3. It sounds like you have a lot on your plate right now. Job transitions, new motherhood, moving homes, the holidays coming up… It’s incredibly normal and expected to feel stress with any ONE of those events, never mind them all piling up at once. Give yourself a break, take a day off, let the housework go, order pizza, and remember that all things resolve in time, you won’t be under these stresses for long. Also, remember that when things get tough, the tough ask for help- you love helping others, I’m sure they want to reciprocate.

    You are doing a great job mama, and don’t forget it.

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